After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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