But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
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