you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize