The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
