I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
