Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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