sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
