i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize