I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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