I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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