there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
