God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize
