Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
