Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize