I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
