Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
They took my balls.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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