I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
