hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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