There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
