Whod you bang
Please, let me fuck your mom
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize
