If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
