Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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