I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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