Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize