what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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