would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
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