Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
