she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize