I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
So apparently I’m into choking now
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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