i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Randomize
