What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
