You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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