don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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