North Korea, Best Korea!
I faked an abortion last night.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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