so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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