is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
