i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
