Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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