Having a random hookup so left but love u
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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