He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
