And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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