I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
