The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
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