gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
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