I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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