giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
