sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
