did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
