I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
