Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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